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NOPE

Dec 24, 2020

This week, as the Great Conjunction brought Saturn and Jupiter into alignment and kicked off a new astrological epoch, we say “Bye Felicia!” to 2020. We shut down the interregnum period, Presidential pardon power and cannibal sandwiches (a Wisconsin specialty). Finally, we delve into the three best Christmas songs...


Dec 17, 2020

Joined this week by a special guest–MEL Magazine deputy editor Alana Hope Levinson–we shut down the election denial holdouts, the Wall Street Journal’s misogynist editorial page, the two worst Christmas songs of all time, and a new mode of speaking known as “hustle husk.” 

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Dec 11, 2020

This week, the Texas attorney general filed a highly unusual lawsuit to overturn the election results in four states–none of which is Texas–because why not shoot the moon? Piers Morgan was mistaken for an actress to whom he bears a striking resemblance: The Pigeon Lady from “Home Alone 2.”  Mario Lopez scored...


Dec 4, 2020

This week, a metal monolith appeared in Southern California after visiting Northern Romania and the inside of a canyon in Utah. In possibly related news, a 7-foot sculpture of a penis went missing in Germany without a trace. An orgy in Brussels attended by government officials from nine European nations got out of hand...


Nov 26, 2020

This week, Canadians got a warning not to let moose lick their cars. Donald Trump pardoned turkeys Corn and Cob as well as chicken Michael Flynn. And Flynn’s very sane lawyer Sidney Powell alleged that Georgia’s Republican Governor conspired with dead Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez to hack Dominion voting machines...